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Articles from Harrangue Man

Rode into the fence again

September 16, 2019 - 23:21 -- Admin

Same fence but from the other direction. My Game of Thrones t-shirt took the impact, tearing of course, but all I have is a bruised arm with a long scratch.I thought about choosing one of the two other routes but I did not want to give that spot power. So I foot pedalled the bike through instead.My arm stings and is tender to the touch. But I didn’t gouge a chunk out so that’s something.Second time out and crashed again; classic.

The Shining move attempted and failed

September 13, 2019 - 19:47 -- Admin

I had a nipple-shrouded rubber ball and tried to bounce it off a milk crate ala Jack Nicholson in the hotel lobby.I threw it past that and it vanished behind a rolled up carpet. Straight away. And I was so confident. Also my ear infection is back worse that ever, I pronged it and tried to blow it clear through a pinched nose. It's about the worst it's ever been and I may die now. Well-played, myself.

Sharted in the back room

September 12, 2019 - 15:15 -- Admin

If you’re going to shart then a back room is the best place for it. I was able to go out a side room to outside round to the front of the front room then from there yell I had to duck out for an hour.I got home, stripped off, threw the dirties into the wash, showered, dress and return and got back in just 40 minutes.I returned with the spare pair of undies for if it happened again.The workplace shart; always bad but this could have been worse.

Ear discharge discharged out window

September 11, 2019 - 20:43 -- Admin

I had an ear infection with pus and wax co mingling and secreting from the canal. I'd finished the meds but the infection was waning so I let it be.It was crossing one of the Kings Avenue bridges that I discovered it, a ball of dried wax and pus that had settled at the bottom just below entry.I flicked the ball out the window.So part of me is now forever Canberra ... a deeply gross part.

Chicken Crimpy haz chicken

September 10, 2019 - 23:17 -- Admin

I'd had a day where all I ate was half a packet of Chicken Crimpy. I was going to give the other half to the chickens. Given chicken salt has no chicken I thought that could be the case here but a scan of the ingredients showed "there be chicken."I'm glad I checked. Otherwise they'd run over only for one of them to then go "Barry?!"

The Infernal Machine

September 10, 2019 - 23:10 -- Admin

Anxiety hampers the willingness and ability to gain a new skill, especially if there is biggly irritation to it. But the re-spawn has its devil payment due; you're forced to go down these paths because it's just part of the gig. I spent three hours grappling with a Lovecraftian Steampunk machine, a hybrid of computer and mechanical—arms, levers, arches, trapdoors and hidden compartments that could burn or rip skin off were you not careful.

Rode into a fence

September 7, 2019 - 22:08 -- Admin

I have a propensity to crash new vehicles into things—-I crashed a houseboat when I was watching TV. Today I got my third bike—an actual purpose electric bike with the two wheels not three.I was wobbly at first but got the hang of it. I got too adventurous though; I zipped from the road to the pavement up a footpath dip then by error went on the very edge of the curb and nearly fell sideways onto the road at speed.