There is only one day of the week I am allowed to do Richard Burton impressions and that day is Wednesday, or Woden's Day, named for the one-eyed god, who, let's face it, was a bit shit given he only had one eye—what kind of greater god cannot regenerate an eye?
Think about it, Norse Mythology. And I can hear there's a couple of giggling Gerties down the back. Enough of that, please.
I'm three sheets to the wind, which, as I recall, is a a fair number of sheets.