A Victorian study shows that many police officers, nurses, doctors and even ministers actively discourage women from reporting rape by their domestic partners. (H/T)

While they believe it is a serious crime, they wouldn't recommend reporting it. The reasoning? The negative treatment they will receive by the court and the long battle to get justice.

They cited as reasons "the disrespectful and damaging treatment of women in court", difficulty in proving it, and long waits before cases got to court.

Silence makes rape acceptable. Do we really want to regress back to when wives were considered the property of their husbands and thus to be treated as the man saw fit? Yes, it is still an acceptable belief in some cultures but that doesn't mean it is right.

Women deserve better.

Men deserve better.

Society deserves better.

According to the Australian Centre for the Study of Sexual Assault , as of 2006 16-20% of reported sexual assault and rape occurs to men (source - PDF). And these are the reported stats. While it is commonplace to understand that women are raped, it is difficult for many to see that men can be too. If women remain silent about their sexual abuse, how can we encourage men to report their rape when there is an even greater stigma surrounding it for them?

Violence of any kind against anyone is wrong. There should be adequate punishment for anyone who is found guilty. If people do not report abuse the abuser will do it again. And again. And again. Until they are stopped.

Just because you are in a relationship it does not mean you cannot be raped. Rape occurs when you are forced to have sex against your will. This means you must consent every time. A marriage certificate is not tacit consent to sex. Nor is a de-facto partnership or a previous sexual relationship or encounter.

Rape is not inconsequential.

"There were several accounts of police trying to dissuade women who had gone to them for help from taking action ... and suggesting the complaint was trivial," the report said.

The researchers from Women's Health Goulburn North East and Upper Murray Centre Against Sexual Assault interviewed 21 partner rape victims from the Goulburn Valley and northeast Victoria, and scores of police and health professionals.

The study, to be released today, found the men believed it was their right to do what they liked with their partner and that society often trivialised partner rape, despite it being a crime since 1985.

"One of the women went to her minister in her church, and he said, 'Go home and pray about it'," study co-author Debra Parkinson said.

"There was domestic violence as well and she said, 'What if he kills me?' And the minister said, 'Well, at least you'll go to heaven'."

Rape results in mental, physical and emotional distress. Sometimes lasting years, even a lifetime. While many people find solace in religion it is not an adequate response to assault. You cannot pray away the scars. It takes enormous courage for anyone to report abuse. To be effectively told that it is of little use to report it doesn't help the victim. If anything, it exacerbates the problem and could even be seen as providing succour to the one doing the victimising.

I am incredibly fortunate in that I've never been raped or abused. But I would like to think that I would be strong enough to report it should it happen. And that anyone I turned to for help would do just that - help. Not dissuade me from taking action.